Tag Archives: Flatbush

Prioritites

Since moving to Brooklyn, I have been ALL-OVER-THE-PLACE with my priorities and I certainly haven’t been feeling like my Type-A self.  I guess it has something to do with that August itch (don’t worry, i got it checked out) of fall coming and school starting.  It’s a scary thought to not have the class schedule structure in my life that I have relied on for so many years.

I considered a Billy Madison ‘back to school’ approach but frankly, I’m way too broke and I actually like post-grad life.  Ifso-facto, I am setting out to find structure in my everyday Brooklyn life…something to ground me regardless of my job, my paycheck, the weather (natural disasters and all) and a slew of dating disasters.

If you are still reading this, you’re probably thinking “Why the hell is this whiny brat telling me about all her soul-searching problems?”.  Don’t worry, this is a one-time deal.   I am only making this entry to hold myself accountable for a much neglected priority in my life: Blogging!  I started blogging as part of a class assignment and I immediately became an addict.  It is a great way to keep in touch with friends, release excitement or frustration, take life a little less seriously and do what I love most–write.

Here you have it:  I, Stephanie Bousquet, solemnly swear to make blogging a priority.  It may be once a week or it may be twice a day.  It might be really funny or it might be me complaining about the Flatbush subway system.  No promises you will like it, but I do promise I’ll keep the entries coming regardless.

For now, I’m attending to some other priorities in my life; grocery shopping (yes, I have decided to learn how to cook) and the gym with my personal slave driver Jillean Micheals.

While you sit in anticipation of my next blog entry, enjoy one of my latest obsessions, Bruno Mars, as he sings about Brooklyn.  Notice when he mentions Flatbush and go easy on his appearance in the video–we’ve all been the victims of a bad spray tan once in our lives.

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Heatwave

Now that I have sent at least one copy of my resume to every employer/scam artist/craigslist groupie, I finally have some free time to blog!  Luckily, you didn’t miss out on a whole lot.

Flatbush has been a ghost town this past week thanks to the scorching temperatures.  I quickly realized that as soon as temps hit 90 degrees, daily life in Flatbush comes to a screeching hault……

Local performers and hooligans flee their stage at Prospect Park…..

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Garbage-men claim “it’s too hot” for trash pick-up…..

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Car-owners can’t bear the heat long enough to finish painting their cars….

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Fruitsellers abandon bags of questionable-looking canteloupes on the sidewalk……

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

EVEN the Trinidad sno-cone man, a fixture on the Flatbush street-vendor scene, has disappeared.  He was unavailable for comments and/or photos but I’ll keep the updates coming.

(not the Flatbush sno-cone vendor)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As you can see, it’s a sad time in Flatbush.  Luckily, there is supposed to be a bumpin’ hip-hop concert in the park this Saturday.  It features Lyricist Lounge, Raekwon, Smif-n-Wessun and Joel Ortiz.  I know none of them.  Regardless, I am sure it will be quite an entertaining evening and the neighborhood will be in rare form.  Wish me luck.

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Cars

 

Lacking depth perception, i am not only a terrible badmitton player but also the world’s worst driver. Because of this, I have never had an attachment to cars.  Flatbush’ers, on the other hand, take their automobiles very seriously. There are strict community regulations all car owners must follow.

Below is an (un)official copy of Flatbush Automotive Law:

1. Automobile Protection
“The Club” is the main way of protecting against car theft. Apparenty this device works best on cars with little to no monetary value because the less the car is worth, the more likely “the club” can be found on the steering wheel.

Luxury cars, which line the curbs outside laundromats, barber shops and jamaicaan restaurants, do not need any theft protection. For some reason,they can be left with doors unlocked,windows down and music blaring and no one will lay a finger on the vehicle.

Beanie baby theft is a budding concern for Flatbush car owners and local officials are working to stop looters from snatching the plush bears, ducks and dogs that decorate back seat windows. (refer to car accessories)

2. Driving Protocol
When operating a motor vehicle drivers must adhere to a distinct code of conduct. Sunglasses must always be worn by at least 2/3 of passengers in the vehicle. Music must always be playing at the highest decibel at all times of the day or night. If you are unsure what is acceptable music, resort to playing “Ms. New Booty” on repeat.

Backseat passengers also have specific roles in the driving experience. First, there must be more than 3 people in the back seat. It is imperative they keep the windows down and yell at least one comment, greeting or phone number to everyone that walks by. If the passenger happens to know someone on the sidewalk, the car must continue driving and the passenger should scream the conversation out the window until he/she is out of sight.

3. Car Accessories/Detailing
Last but not least is the matter of car decor. Every car must have a signature touch to make it stand out from other cars. Popular decorations include dried flowers circa 1985, extra-large flags, seat pillows and of course, stuffed animals. It is recommended that car owners remove all stuffed animals from their childrens’ rooms and put them on the dashboard.

Car exteriors also deserve special attention.  Windows must be completely black.  Not tinted; BLACK .  No one should EVER be able to see into the car…except for the 23 hours of the day when windows are rolled down.  Decals and license plates are also held in high esteem.  Identifying phrases and titles really add personality to the car.  For example, that blue jetta hatchback would just be your run-of-the-mill car without neon yellow “ISLAND BOI” decals slapped on all door panels and bumpers.  And how would anyone know you loved Betty Boop so much if you didn’t have a Betty Boop license plate frame, bobble head and fur steering wheel cover?  It’s all about making a personal statement.

 

 

 

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An Intro to Flatbush Nightlife

The first and last thing my father said to me on move-in day was “Remember, this is not a vacation.”  But he couldn’t have been more wrong.  This is JUST like all my college spring-break vacations.  I feel like I have taken permanent residency at a Breezes resort in the Bahamas.

And the nightlife is no exception.  So far, I have only discovered one bar in the neighborhood–Mango Seed Restaurant.  In the bar’s defense, it is really a hidden gem on Flatbush.  Sandwiched between a high-end wig distributor and Goodwill Gospel store, Mango Seed is on the cutting edge of Flatbush innovation.  I checked in, liked the Facebook page and started following @MangoSeedDining on twitter.  5 days away from being mayor?  Holler at your girl.  (Sidenote: I am still dying to know what is actually sold at a Goodwill Gospel Store.  Any thoughts?)

Overall, Mango Seed exceeded my expectations.  They serve my favorite kind of drinks, extra strong, and I didn’t even have to hit on the bartender to get Boys II Men played before 11 p.m.  On top of that, the servers were really friendly and polite.  And by polite I mean they did not start the conversation with “Oh, you MUST be new to the neighborhood.”

Hopefully, this is only an small introduction into Flatbush nightlife.  I’ll be scouring the streets over the next few weeks to find some other local watering holes to call my own.  As for tonight, I will be returning to Mango Seed for karaoke! It’s rumored to be the “it” place on a Thursday in Flatbush…..(besides Popeye’s Chicken, which always maintains a steady influx of customers into the early morning hours).  Anyone who is anyone will be there and I refuse to be on the outside of Flatbush elite.  Wish me luck, I’ll report back with updates tomorrow!

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